She is My Wife… Not My Partner
Published on January 09, 2025
Shes my wife not my partner

Inside: We cannot allow the institution of marriage, created by God Himself, to be hijacked and made into something pretended to be equal to marriage.

It was a hot, June day in Idaho.  RaShell was beautiful in her wedding dress.  After the reception, she and I walked out together with our friends and family lined up on each side throwing birdseed.  One particular person went a little overboard with the birdseed but I won’t use this forum to throw my brother under the bus by name (my older brother…  my only older brother… you know who you are!) 😊.  Like any wedding day, not everything had gone perfect.  The biggest problem was the air conditioning was not working at the church – wow, it was hot!  None of that mattered, however, as it was a beautiful ceremony and RaShell and I had stated our goal early to each other, “When it’s over, we want to be married.”  As long as we accomplished that objective, we were calling it a success!

 After we made it through the birdseed, and other obstacles recently installed in the car, RaShell and I drove into the city and checked in at the hotel where we would be staying.  We had not eaten much at the reception – or any other time that day – and we were both STARVING!  We decided to order a pizza.  I grabbed the yellow pages, found a number and called a nearby pizza restaurant (because that’s how we had to do it back then).  When they answered, I emphasized, “My WIFE and I, would like to order a pizza…”  We still laugh about that.  I have often thought the pizza guy must have thought we were weird!  It was the first time I had ever ordered a pizza with my wife – it was an exciting moment! 

Jason & RaShell Southerland June 8, 1996. Off to order pizza!

so official

 “My wife” – Wow, that sounded official…  it was official!  I was so excited to be able to use that special word – reserved for one person.  That word that everyone knew defined our relationship and would define it for the rest of our lives.  There was no doubt about what that meant and I was so excited to use it – even in such a mundane task like ordering a pizza.  It is a beautiful and special word.  She is a beautiful and special lady.  I was excited – as I still am – to be married to RaShell and to be able to call her my wife. 

 I am writing this article on January 9, 2025.  President Jimmy Carter passed away several days ago, December 29, 2024, at age 100.  Today, his funeral is being held at the National Cathedral in Washington.  Honestly, I don’t remember much about the Carter Presidency, and haven’t followed him much since that time.  I was born in 1971, so Nixon was President when I was born, and I guess Ford came and went before I ever started paying attention to Presidents!  About the only thing I remember about President Carter’s administration is seeing the news late in his Presidency that reported how many days the American hostages had been held in Iran.  Every day, multiple times a day, that seemed to be on TV.  That is all I remember from President Carter and as a result, I guess I never liked his Presidency much.  There is one thing about him, though, that is remarkable, and that was his marriage with his wife Rosalynn.

 Jimmy and Rosalynn were married on July 7, 1946.  When Rosalynn passed away in November, 2023, they had been married over 77 years.  That is longer than any other President and First Lady in history.  In a C-Span interview in August, 2015, President Carter said, “The best thing I ever did was marrying Rosalynn. That’s the pinnacle of my life.”

 Sadly, when our current President and First Lady, Joe and Jill Biden, put out a statement about the death of President Carter, they say, “We will always cherish seeing him and Rosalynn together. The love shared between Jimmy and Rosalynn Carter is the definition of partnership…” 

Personally, when I read that, I reacted, “That’s not a partnership – that’s a MARRIAGE!!”  I know they probably said that to try to claim some kind of equivalency in human relationships, however they may be put together, including distortions of marriage that they have been advocating while in office, but a “partnership” is not the same thing as a “marriage”. 

marriage is different than a partnership

Webster’s 1828 Dictionary defines each of these terms as:

Partnership – The association of two or more persons for the purpose of undertaking and prosecuting any business, particularly trade or manufactures, at their joint expense. 

Marriage – The act of uniting a man and woman for life; wedlock; the legal union of a man and woman for life. marriage is a contract both civil and religious, by which the parties engage to live together in mutual affection and fidelity, till death shall separate them. marriage was instituted by God himself for the purpose of preventing the promiscuous intercourse of the sexes, for promoting domestic felicity, and for securing the maintenance and education of children.

differences between Partnership and Marriage

Wow, yes, that sums up the differences between Partnership and Marriage…  Honestly, I do not know how Jimmy Carter would have felt about it, or whether he would have agreed or disagreed with his marriage being cheapened into something more like a business arrangement, in order to sound more accommodating to distortions of marriage.  Again, I don’t really know much about him.    But I believe we, as Christians, cannot allow the institution of marriage – created by God Himself as Webster reminds us in his 1828 Dictionary – to be hijacked and lessened to make it quasi-equal to distorted, sinful relationships that our current Presidential administration would like to pretend are equal to marriages.

 RaShell and I were married on June 8, 1996.  That means in June of this year, many pizzas and 6 children later, we will celebrate 29 years of marriage – by God’s definition – the only definition that matters.  I love you Baby, thank you for being my wife! 

More blog posts on marriage:

 

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Comments

12 Comments

  1. Elaine Loftin

    AMEN! I am not going to judge or support same sex “marriage” – especially if they call it “marriage”. “Marriage” is already, has already, been defined spiritually, publicly, and socially.

    When Eve chose to partake of the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden, she earned “Free Will” for humanity and the slew of other consequences. So, if two humans of the same sex CHOOSE to enter into a relationship & commit themselves to a life of consequences defined as sinful – then marriage is not a word they can use because “marriage” is not sinful AND created to “not be sinful”.

    I have said that for most of my adult life (because same-sex unions were non-existent before I was an adult). I have no preference on what to call it, but “marriage” is the wrong noun to use to describe same-sex commitments.

    Reply
    • Jason Southerland

      The Bible has several names for it that would work for me… 🙂 But yes, definitely not marriage! Thank you for your comment!

      Reply
  2. Bob Kessener

    Spot on, my venerable brother! You, Jimmy and I have shared in the great blessing of a wonderful wife. Jenny and I were married in Laguna Beach, CA on Memorial Day (May 27) 1978. Taking those vows in front of a crowd of witnesses felt amazing, significant, honorable, and a bit intimidating: would I be good enough. But true to God’s Genesis statement, we two have in fact become one flesh and all of our children and their spouses love the Lord as well.

    I love you two!

    Reply
    • Jason Southerland

      What a wonderful blessing that your children and their spouses love the Lord! Our children are just starting to get married… one got married in August! We’re looking forward to seeing how God works in their families as well, and looking forward to grandbabies! Wow, so by my math you and Jenny will celebrate 47 years this year! Congratulations! That is beautiful. Thank you so much for your comments!

      Reply
  3. Glenn Curlett

    Jason, what a wonderful article you have put together. I am thankful for your convictions in your spiritual life. Those convictions follow through, with RaShells along your side, in your marriage, your family, and your commitment to encouraging others to learn and live by the Constitution of the United States of America. I join many others in saying “Thank to both of you!”

    Connie, my wife of fifty-one years, and I relate to the spiritual convictions that have God as the center of our lives together. God bless you, RaShell, and your family as you honor Him with Love.

    Glenn Curlett
    Highland Village, Texas

    Reply
    • Jason Southerland

      Glenn – thank you so much for your kind words. We have missed you! Congratulations on your 51 years of marriage and for all the ways God has blessed your family. May we all once again make God’s Word the foundation of this great nation! Thank you again!

      Reply
  4. Amanda Ratcliff

    Great article! Language matters and this is one of a million ways our culture is shifting away from traditional, biblical values. Congratulations on your wonderful marriage. My husband and I have been married almost 11 years and it just keeps getting better.
    Thanks for your work!

    Reply
    • Jason Southerland

      Thank you so much and congratulations to you and your husband! I believe we can slow (or stop) the shift away from Biblical values if we stand up and speak out! Thank you for your comment!

      Reply
  5. Gary Barnard

    It’s amazing how little attention is paid to the vows of marriage. My parents were married for life and honored their vows. My wife passed away a few years back so our marriage ended then. Today people get married but are too quick to forget their vows and break them at the slightest differences in minor dis-agreements. I commend you two for your devotion to the institution of marriage and the keeping of your vows before GOD and others.

    Reply
    • Jason Southerland

      Thank you! I appreciate your words here and I am so sorry to hear of your wife’s passing. Thank you for fulfilling your oath to her. It is also a blessing that you (like me) have a heritage of lasting marriages in previous generations. I definitely agree people value marriage far too little today. Often it is cheapened by those (like the example of Jimmy Carter’s marriage as a “partnership”) who would try to make it equal to other relationships they are trying to advance. Thank you, sir, for your comment.

      Reply
  6. Mary Beth Phillips

    Good article. Dennis and I were married on June 5, 1971. We did not expect marriage to be so drastically changed during our lifetime. I am praying for the overturn of Obergefell which has been a bill used to “redefine” marriage. I think one of our problems today is that English has one word, LOVE, that in Greek is separated into four different words that better show various meanings of LOVE: agape, philia. storge and eros. . Too many Americans want to say, “It’s only about loving someone”. As you point out in your article a partnership is not a marriage.
    I agree with you!

    Reply
    • Jason Southerland

      Congratulations on your exceptional marriage! That is an incredible blessing and a powerful example of how God intended marriage! I so agree I would love for Obergefell to be overturned – but it really bothers me that we would presume to have any jurisdiction at all to take an institution that God created and redefine it into a criminal arrangement that God calls an abomination, and one that carried the death penalty under His law. I don’t know who the Supreme Court thinks they are! Thank you for your comment!

      Reply

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